My instincts were right. Not pregnant yet. My April egg didn’t turn out to be our baby. We took the pregnancy test this morning and all we saw was one lonely little red line. I wasn’t surprised since I’ve been spotting for days now and feeling the rage of Aunt Flow.
I have a confession to make. This is the second pregnancy test we’ve taken. Since Mother’s Day was last Sunday – I thought it would be a nifty idea to take an early test and hopefully, just maybe we would find out we were going to be moms on Mother’s Day. When that result came out negative I was very surprised and disappointed but still a little hopeful that maybe we just tested too early. I think it prepared me for the second test though. I wasn’t as upset as I thought I’d be at getting a negative result.
It’s hard to personally tell everyone who is curious, that we are not pregnant.
I keep wondering what could have gone wrong. Bad timing? Bad swimmers? Maybe they sat in that syringe a little too long? Maybe I really didn’t ovulate on the 27th like the Docs said I did. They took tests though right? Are those hormone tests accurate? Why did those little tadpoles fail me? Or did my egg fail them? Who knows…. it’s back to the drawing board for us. (if it were only that easy, I’m a rather talented artist.. ha) As soon as Auntie pays me a visit, I will be back on the table for more tests – pants-less and vulnerable. You learn quickly that there is no room for pride and modesty when you want a baby so desperately. You’ll pretty much do whatever that doctor asks you to do. If she asks me to stand on my head and bark like a dog, I will do it if it means it’ll make a baby. I’m sure it won’t come to that though